Thursday, May 31, 2012

Pawning My Heart

My eyes actually teared up as I wrote the title because I do feel like MacKenzie is my heart. From the first moment she arrived in an Apple Macbook Pro box encased within a disarming griddle box, I have loved her unconditionally. Her sleek aluminum casing, cool and smooth to the touch, caused exuberance to bubble up and overflow from the place where my heart's supposed to be. She's brought me so much joy and hope for a future of my imaginings.

So it hurts me to do this, to even contemplate doing this. Fat tears spill over feeble eyelashes as I type this entry. I miss her already and she waits in my lap, unable to do anything but glare at me as my fingers dance across her keyboard.

I'm so sorry, baby, but paying for medical insurance for my biological children is a necessity. I pray I'll be able to take you out in two weeks. God, this hurts.


P.S. In case you haven't figured it out, that means I'll be missing for a couple of weeks-- unless I pen something from my work computer. Sigh.

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